When it comes to preparing children for life’s challenges, emotional intelligence (EI) is one of the most essential skills they can develop. Building emotional intelligence in kids and schools is more than just teaching children how to manage their feelings; it’s about helping them understand their emotions, communicate effectively, and build meaningful relationships. Whether at home or in the classroom, fostering emotional intelligence equips children with tools they can use throughout their lives.
We were recently fortunate to have Stephanie Pinto on our podcast, where she shared fantastic insights about emotional intelligence, its importance, and how we can help kids better understand their emotions. In this post, we’ll break down what emotional intelligence is, how we can help children express their feelings in healthy ways, and share Stephanie’s highlights, as well as resources for families and educators to get started.
What Is Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognise, understand, and manage our emotions, as well as to relate to others’ emotions in a positive way. It’s made up of five core components:
- Self-awareness – Recognising your own emotions and their impact.
- Self-regulation – Controlling or redirecting disruptive emotions and impulses.
- Motivation – Using emotions to pursue goals with energy and persistence.
- Empathy – Understanding the emotions of others and responding appropriately.
- Social skills – Managing relationships and building social networks.
For kids, emotional intelligence is a key factor in how they navigate the world. From handling conflicts with friends to dealing with stressful schoolwork, emotional intelligence helps them manage the ups and downs of daily life. Children with high emotional intelligence tend to have better mental health, improved academic performance, and more positive social interactions.
Why Emotional Intelligence Is Important for Kids
Developing emotional intelligence is a foundational skill that supports kids in nearly every area of life. As Stephanie Pinto shared in our podcast, “Emotional intelligence is the foundation of all other types of intelligence.” When kids manage their emotions well, they’re better equipped for learning, problem-solving, and building relationships.
Emotionally intelligent children are more resilient and adaptable to change. They handle challenges without becoming overwhelmed. These skills are key not just for school, but for building confidence, empathy, and strong relationships.
Helping Kids Understand and Express Emotions
The good news is that emotional intelligence can be nurtured from a young age. Here are some simple and effective ways to support kids in understanding and managing their emotions:
- Start Conversations About Emotions Early
Encourage open and honest discussions about feelings. Ask your child how they feel throughout the day, not just when something is wrong. It’s important to normalise talking about emotions. Teach them to name their feelings—like happy, sad, excited, or frustrated—so they can better identify and express them. - Validate Their Feelings
One of the most powerful ways to support emotional development is to validate a child’s feelings, no matter how big or small. When a child feels heard and understood, it boosts their emotional intelligence and their ability to regulate their feelings. Acknowledge their emotions with statements like, “I see you’re feeling upset. That’s okay, do you want to talk about it?” - Model Healthy Emotional Expression
Children learn a lot by observing their parents and caregivers. When we model emotional awareness, whether it’s talking about our own feelings or practicing calming techniques, it shows them that it’s okay to express emotions in healthy ways. By being open about our emotions, we create a safe space for them to do the same. - Teach Problem-Solving Skills
Help kids find ways to solve problems when they encounter emotional challenges. For instance, if they feel angry, you could suggest taking a few deep breaths, counting to ten, or drawing a picture of how they feel. Encouraging problem-solving boosts emotional intelligence by helping kids learn to manage their emotions in constructive ways. - Encourage Empathy and Compassion
Empathy is an essential component of emotional intelligence, and it can be taught through daily interactions. Encourage your child to put themselves in other people’s shoes and consider how others might be feeling. Whether it’s through sharing or helping a friend, teaching empathy strengthens emotional intelligence and social relationships.
Stephanie Pinto’s Key Insights on Emotional Intelligence
During our podcast with Stephanie, she shared several valuable takeaways for helping children develop emotional intelligence:
- Emotional Intelligence Is a Learnable Skill
One of the most empowering messages Stephanie shared is that emotional intelligence is not something kids are born with—it’s something they can learn and develop over time. With guidance and practice, children can improve their emotional skills, just like any other form of learning. - Create a Safe Emotional Environment
Stephanie highlighted the importance of a safe and supportive environment where children feel comfortable expressing themselves without fear of judgment. When kids feel understood and accepted, they’re more likely to share their feelings and build their emotional intelligence. - Active Listening Builds Connection
Listening with intention was another key point Stephanie emphasised. By actively listening to a child’s feelings, we show them that their emotions matter. This builds trust and helps kids develop better communication skills.
Watch the Full Conversation with Stephanie Pinto
We’re so grateful to Stephanie for sharing her wisdom. If you’d like to hear more, check out the full podcast episode here:
Watch the podcast with Stephanie Pinto
Support for Families: Stephanie’s Book “From Chaos to Connection”
If you’re looking for more guidance on fostering emotional intelligence in your child, we highly recommend Stephanie Pinto’s Amazon best-seller, From Chaos to Connection. The book offers practical strategies for parents and caregivers to help children build emotional intelligence, navigate challenges, and create stronger, more meaningful connections. It’s a fantastic resource for families looking to support their child’s emotional growth.
Conclusion
Building emotional intelligence in kids and schools is one of the most valuable things we can do to set them up for a successful and fulfilling life. By teaching children how to understand, manage, and express their emotions, we help them navigate challenges, build resilience, and create positive relationships. Whether at home or in school, building emotional intelligence is a powerful way to ensure that every child grows up with the tools they need to thrive.